Mother of the Bride (and Groom!) | Mary Lazzari
We have had the absolute pleasure of working with Mary Lazzari twice over the past two years. She helped plan her daughter Gina’s 2019 wedding and most recently her son’s. Gina + Logan were married in an elegant Lexington, KY celebration filled with blush and burgundy floral details and lots of candles! Kristi + Nick celebrated in an intimate backyard wedding at Mary’s home with their dearest friends and family.
Mary’s previous wedding planning experience and positive attitude were indispensable for navigating her son Nick and wife, Kristi’s recent wedding. They faced the difficult decision to change course at the last minute in order to move forward their original wedding date and keep guests safe. Mary shares her reflections on being an integral part of both her children’s wedding celebrations.
What part of the stationery design process did you enjoy the most?
I have worked with Poeme on two different wedding stationery suites, one for my daughter's wedding in 2019 and one for my son's wedding in 2020. Prior to our appointment for my daughter's wedding, I had the attitude that I didn't want to put a lot of money into something that people just ended up throwing away. So I expected that we would choose something nice but basic.
Within about 15 minutes of our appointment with Kristen, my entire attitude changed. Kristen took my daughter's ideas for the invitation coupled with a description of the type of wedding we were planning and right before our eyes, she designed the most gorgeous stationery for the day. All of a sudden, the invitation became an important element for the wedding.
Kristen showed us how it sets the tone for the whole day and we fell in love with the design after playing around with the fonts, the colors, and the general look of it. To be able to see it get created on the computer program was very satisfying and exciting.
All Worth It!
Kristen showed us how [the stationery suite] sets the tone for the whole day and we fell in love with the design after playing around with the fonts, the colors, and the general look of it. To be able to see it get created on the computer program was very satisfying and exciting.
We walked out of that appointment with so much enthusiasm and excitement. And it was all worth it. As the RSVPs came in, people put comments on their response cards about how beautiful the invitations were or how it was the most beautiful invitation they have ever received. We carried the design into the table cards, the seating cards, and the church program. It all added a beautiful component to the entire day and made for gorgeous photos.
Bradley Quinn Photography
We walked out of that appointment with so much enthusiasm and excitement. And it was all worth it. As the RSVPs came in, people put comments on their response cards about how beautiful the invitations were or how it was the most beautiful invitation they have ever received. We carried the design into the table cards, the seating cards, and the church program. It all added a beautiful component to the entire day and made for gorgeous photos.
When my son got engaged, I found myself in the non-traditional role of being the primary helper to my future daughter in law with her wedding planning as her mom lived out of state. I knew that the only place to consider the invitation design was at Poeme. This time though, I knew ahead of time how an invitation can set the tone for the day but my daughter-in-law didn't quite understand until we began the process with Kristen.
We walked out of our appointment with the same feeling of excitement. I think part of the excitement both times was that we could actually see the results of the discussion right away. Granted it was on a computer but it was still there to see. There was no waiting for the wedding day like you have to do with the flowers, cake, and decor designs. Overall, it may have been my favorite part of all the planning!
Tell us your experience of Kristi and Nick’s wedding day as Mother of the Groom. What were your most memorable moments?
Shortly after my son got engaged my future daughter-in-law, Kristi, asked if I would help her with her wedding planning. Her parents live out of state and our daughter had just gotten married so I knew where to begin and the process was all still fresh in my mind. It's a non-traditional role to be the planner when you are the mother of the groom and I felt honored that Kristi had asked me but I also knew that I had to be mindful of her parents, particularly her mother. I had to be sure that this wedding reflected Nick and Kristi, and met the approval of her parents in terms of the type of wedding, the details, and the budget.
I took on the role of a wedding planner with Kristi and we looked at options for each aspect of the wedding and she would run the options by her parents. Fortunately, her parents are easy-going people so there was never any kind of conflict or disagreement on details. Even more fortunately,for me, was that Kristi is a naturally upbeat and joyful person. She was enthusiastic about everything so she made it fun and easy to help her.
My favorite moments included the invitation design appointment and the linen/table setting appointment at All Occasions. Those things are some of the prettiest parts of a wedding to me. In addition, Kristi and I are both "foodies" so we had a great time discussing and selecting the menu and the wines to serve with the dinner. I took a lot of pride in what she and I had planned (especially being how covid completely forced us to change many of the original plans) but I also knew that come wedding day, the day had to be about Kristi and Nick and her mom.
I had just had my mother of the bride experience so I knew how important it was for her mom to have it too. I admit though that I was worried that I might not find it easy to take that step back after having invested so much effort in the planning but by the time the wedding day rolled around I found myself just wanting to enjoy moments with my son and the rest of our family. The most memorable part of the wedding day was witnessing the joy that Kristi and Nick had for each other. Not just happiness and excitement but joy!
Joy that was reflected in their voices, their mannerisms, the way Kristi was jumping up and down just a little while doing her vows, their smiles and the way my son looked at Kristi and how she looked back at him. Yes, the food was delicious and the wine was amazing and the flowers were gorgeous but the joy? It cannot be bought or forced or made up. It came from within them and was so genuine as to be unforgettable.
Shelby Street Photography
When my son got engaged, I found myself in the non-traditional role of being the primary helper to my future daughter in law with her wedding planning as her mom lived out of state. I knew that the only place to consider the invitation design was at Poeme.
What details did you focus on most in the planning process and what are your thoughts on planning during the pandemic?
We started the planning process for my son's wedding in October of 2019. They chose the date of August 29th, 2020. By March 1st, we had secured the chapel and the venue and all the major vendors for a typical wedding and reception for 250 guests. When Covid hit in mid March, we were optimistic that things would be back to normal by the end of August so we did nothing in terms of changing our plans.
When the pandemic was still happening by the time the invitations needed to be ordered, we were beginning to wonder if things could proceed as planned. Many couples we knew of were postponing their weddings for another year but Nick and Kristi decided that they still wanted to get married on their chosen date. So we optimistically ordered the invitations and adopted a mantra to live by until the wedding was over-"Roll With It." We said that we would make adjustments as the situation demanded since the decision was made not to change the wedding date. As it turned out, we had to roll with a lot of changes.
We remained hopeful that things could go as planned until about mid-July and then the anxiety set in over whether or not the state would change mandates on how many people could gather or shut things down again. And what would we do if those things happened just a week or two before the wedding?
So we made the very difficult decision to downsize the wedding to a group of 50 and change the location to our backyard. We had already sent out the invitations and gotten a lot of RSVPs so we had to "uninvite" the majority of the guests but everyone understood. Once the decision was made to do that, we felt like we had control of the wedding again and our anxiety was lessened. We bridged as much of the original plans over to the backyard wedding theme as possible.
We had the same officiant, the same caterer serving the same meal, the same table settings, the same florist, and the same table cards, place cards, and programs. We lost our deposits on the chapel, venue, and DJ because we canceled those things. We had the same music but just used our house system to play the music. We spaced the tables out and people sat with their own families. Hand sanitizer stations were available from the caterer and masks were a choice. Our guests said afterward that they all felt comfortable and we are very grateful no one got sick afterward.
Bridging the plans helped to make the wedding seem somewhat the same even though it wasn't anything like we originally planned. When things got stressful we just kept repeating "roll with it" because the wedding was going to happen on that day, somehow. There is no getting around the anxiety of worrying if someone is going to get sick from attending a wedding right now so you do the best you can.
As it turned out, the small crowd of mostly family was very intimate and personal, the food was amazing, the wine was flowing, the weather was beautiful, and the atmosphere was full of love. Both Nick and Kristi said they can't imagine the wedding having been any other way than what it turned out to be. And that is all that really matters.
GINA + LOGAN | CREATIVE PARTNERS
Gina’s Dress: White Wisteria | Planning & Flowers: Refined Social Events | Day of Coordinator: Jen Guiler | Venues: St. Paul Catholic Church & Keene Barn at Keeneland | Photography: Bradley Quinn Photography
Kristi + Nick | Creative Partners
Photographer: Shelby Street Studios | Florist: Secret Garden | Catering: Eat Well Celebrations | Kristi’s Wedding Gown: Wendy's Bridal